According to the Talmud, in the past, flowers were an essential part of a Jewish funeral. They served a practical purpose – to hide the smells emitted from the deceased. However, in modern times, fragrant flowers, or any flowers at all, have been deemed unnecessary and are no longer welcome at a Jewish funeral. In their place, contributions can be made to a synagogue, organization or hospital in remembrance of the deceased. These monetary contributions are considered the norm.

This is not to say that it is against the religion – it simply is not a custom that is followed.

If sympathy flowers must be sent, it is best to address them to the home of the bereaved, rather than to the location of the service. Sprays, simple bouquets and tributes may be appropriate, however it is best to avoid arrangements that are ostentatious. This goes for the clothing worn to the service as well. Because Jewish funerals take place very shortly after the deceased has passed away, the flowers are often received by the bereaved during the mourning period, known as Shiva. Shiva traditionally lasts a week (but is shorter in recent times) during which the family stays at home to grieve.

Alternatively, flowers may also be presented to the bereaved so that they may be placed at the burial site. However, this should not be done during the service.

Gift Baskets
While there is no law that says flowers are forbidden, sending something else that conveys your sentiments may be more appropriate. You can avoid making the situation more unpleasant by sending something that is customary – a gift basket.

A gift basket filled with food is ideal. It may be a fruit basket or a basket of other edible goods, however it is vital that all are designated Kosher. A card can be included with a simple message expressing your sincerity.